Aviva's Blog

I haven’t posted a blog since May. I have gotten to the point that I feel physically sick every time I even think about writing a blog and how long it’s been since I published one. Sometimes I sit down and write one, try my hardest to express what I have been feeling. But I’m so bad with words and I really don’t like writing and I can never convey the things I feel on to paper. Sometimes I have a good idea for a blog whether it being about my forms or about class. But then I say to myself “I can’t post this, I haven’t done enough.” “You can’t post anything now.” So I leave them in drafts, I delete them. And by the time I might have picked up the courage to post them they have lost relevance. You can’t post something about a class that happened 3 weeks ago or a conversation that happened 2 week ago. I’m starting to lose the courage to post this blog already.  So other then not blogging what have I been doing? Well I haven’t been doing enough pushups or sit ups, I have barely done my...

Today I got to work on my forms with my sibling. I worked on the part of Mlong Kuen that I already knew and solidified it, but I also worked on learning a few more moves in the form. I figured out parts I was doing wrong as well as more of it, and now I feel a lot more confident with the part of the form I have. We spend about an hour going back and forth doing our forms. It was fun because we were listening to music as we were practicing. It was also more motivating to do it with someone else pushing me forward.  50,000 50,000 1,000 1,000 1,000 1,609 1,000 9,000 Total 3480 3830 191 112 113 297 351 4080 Amount Left 46,520 46,170 809 888 887 1,312 649 4,920 # I should be 13411 13411 268 268 268 432 268 2414 Per Day 130 130 3 3 3 4 3 23 Push-ups Sit-ups Hand Form Weapon Form Sparring Kilometers AOKs Art

Last Monday I got to go to the adult classes. This was the first time I went since I got a black belt. Which was a bit weird, and scary. This is because I was in front of the class(bowing in) and now having to help out in the class I used to be in, which was different but still enjoyable. I didn't actually do any teaching of a group, although I was given the opportunity, there was one person who didn't have sparing mitts so we both went to the back and I was running applications with them. Which was scary because it was on the spot and I had no clue what I was doing.  50,000 50,000 1,000 1,000 1,000 1,609 1,000 9,000 Total 3450 3790 176 112 103 287 336 3900 Amount Left 46,550 46,210 824 888 897 1,322 664 5,100 # I should be 12891 12891 258 258 258 415 258 2320 Per Day 130 130 3 3 3 4 3 23 Push-ups Sit-ups Hand Form Weapon Form Sparring Kilometers AOKs Art

I have failed. For the last two months I have put out a total of two blogs. When I got my black belt I felt like there was now a pressure on me to write great meaningful blogs about kung fu and I got scared. I know basically nothing. Every time I tried to write a blog I kept second guessing myself, and worrying that I would say something wrong or it wouldn't be good enough. So I didn't post anything at all. And now I have failed. I have failed you guys and I have failed myself. I feel very disconnected to the team and it is completely my fault. I will be more consistent I promise. I'm sorry for letting this get out of hand.

One of the coolest things about the IHC is watching grow more comfortable with their weapons. At first everyone is just experiment with their new weapons, trying new moves and just getting a feel for it. At first, it’s all awkward movements and missed strikes, but over time, you can see them start to make it their own. Making a weapon form is about self-expression and learning how to move in a way that feels natural to you, while still having proper techniques.  I'm still getting comfortable with my weapon. It's different then ones I have used in the past, that's part of the reason I chose it. I'm really excided to see how my forms come together. Push ups 530 Sit ups 530 Hand forms 25 Weapon forms 10 Sparring 10 Km 78 Art 780

 Hello!  My name is Aviva Csillag. I have been doing kung fu for 13 years and this is my 3rd year of participating in the I Ho Chuan. This year my weapon is the horse chopping blade, and my hand form is Mlong Kuen. One of my personal requirements is to do more art. This is because art is something that I do for myself that I enjoy, but I tend to not set time away for it. So I'm hoping that this will force me to set time for myself. One of my struggles is blogging, I often don't want to say the wrong thing so instead I say nothing. I'm excited for this new year!

     Over the break I have been practicing my forms by myself a lot and I have felt a lot of improvement. I feel my stamina getting better and the techniques that I am doing improve. This week I met up with Todai Raw to work on our 5 techniques and while we were there we worked on some of our forms together. Practicing with others is usually way better than practicing alone for me. When I'm with others, I get different ideas and feedback that helps me improve faster. And having people around keeps you motivated and makes you feel more accountable, so I'm less likely to slack off. While working with him I remembered a lot of things that we had previously discussed in class and I was able to bring it home and reapply it. 8,720 Push Ups  9,950 Sit Ups  1,090 Ks  1,163 Hand Form  1,197 Weapon  774   Sparring  1,834 Japanese  13,345 Reading Favorite word: Plethora: A large or excessive amount of something.

I really enjoyed this weekend. I got a lot done and was very productive. I worked a lot on my kung fu as well as my schoolwork. I also took care of myself by doing things I enjoy like art and cooking. Although it was really busy and I did a lot of things it made me feel rejuvenated and ready for this week. I have a low attention span so when I get bored of something, I usually just go on my phone. But this weekend every time I got bored of something I did something else productive like if I was practising my kung fu and I got bored I started writing my essay And if I got bored of that, I did some drawing so the whole day I was being productive, but it didn’t feel like I was working the whole day.  Favourite word:  Vehemently: in a forceful, passionate, or intense manner My numbers:  8,340 Push Ups 9,570 Sit Ups 1,029 Ks 1,106 Hand Form 1,140 Weapon 749 Sparring 1,796 Japanese 13,105 Reading

 On Sunday I went the red apple for the kinsmen toy drive and It was great. There were so many people willing to donate and that seemed interested in it. We got so many donations. One person stood out to me in particular. It was a man that came in to check his lotto ticket, we were right next to the lotto thing so he looked over and started asking questions. We explained the ways that you could donate. And then he went off into the store. 15 or 20 minutes passed so we assumed that he had left already and we just didn't see h im. Then he went to check out and the only thing he got was a toy to donate.  I think that this person stood out for me the most because he went out of his way to go look for a toy to donate even though he wasn't planning to buy anything before. 7,950 Push Ups 9,180 Sit Ups 997           Ks 1,046 Hand Form 1,090 Weapon 729           Sparring 1,749 Japanese 12,745 Reading Favorite w...

Me and my lion building team worked on our line after class tonight. I had a lot of fun working with them. Though it seemed like we did more laughing than lion building. I believe that it was extremely good for me. Sometimes it seems like it would be easier to do it on your own, and in some cases it is, but I think that doing it by yourself, stops you from experiencing things you would have if you did it with other people. I’m very happy that I got to work with my group and that they joked with me. 7,740 Push Ups 8,970 Sit Ups 981 Ks 1,026 Hand Form 1,072 Weapon 689 Sparring 1,728 Japanese 12,625     Reading Favourite word this week:  Conviction: firmly held belief or opinion. 

Today my cat past away in my arms. To me he wasn't just a cat he was my best friend, my everything. when ever I felt down he was there. I love him with everything I have. today I haven't done much of anything. But all day I felt the need to blog. Before I started writing my blog I looked at my numbers. One of my requirement for this year was to take care of him. His death kinda makes me feel like I failed. but Once I added up the minutes that I spent cuddling/petting him I realized that just this morning I reached my goal. And isn't that beautiful in its own way.  7,680 Push Ups  8,910 Sit Ups  973      Ks  1,016 Hand Form  1,072 Weapon  679      Sparring  1,717 Japanese  12,445 Reading 4,015 Pet Jasper My favorite word: Cherish: Protect and care for someone lovingly.

In class we were doing the butterfly sword form and was having a look of fun with it. It the start of it I was having some troubles with the flipping of the sword but I slowly started to figure it out as we went. I started to enjoy myself quite a bit. It’s strange to be able to see my progress in just one class but I felt like I made a lot of progress. I enjoyed it a lot and will keep on playing with it.  Numbers:  7,170 Push Ups 8,400 Sit Ups 905 Ks 965 Hand Form 1,021 Weapon 659 Sparring 1,666 Japanese 12,265 Reading Favourite word:  Volatile:  liable to change rapidly and unpredictably, especially for the worse.

I have been really struggling with putting myself back out there and starting to blog again. I keep on sitting down to write something and start writing something that is relevant to my journey and life but not necessarily something I want to share with everyone. It’s like the only things I want to write about are the things that I just want me to know. In a way it’s good because it’s like I’m talking to myself and figuring out what’s going on. It’s also not because I don’t know how to make what I wrote something that I’m comfortable with sharing without taking everything away from it and turning into a boneless paragraph. I’m not very good at writing and I think that previously I was writing for everyone else and not myself. But I think I’m going to try to write more for me. When I would write a blog I would always be to focused on the grammar or how I said it and I would lose my thought before I finished because I wasn’t thinking about why I was writing I was just thinking about how ...