Aviva's Blog

There are two sides to everything. Good and bad. Hot and cold. You cant control something happening but you can control how you choose to look at it.  Most of the time I feel down or discouraged when I think of what I have yet to do. So why don't I look at all the stuff I have done. All the improvement I have already made just this year.  There are two sides to a coin. You can choose what one it lands on.

When I woke up today all I could think about is how much my legs hurt. Yesterdays class was so exhausting. So the kicks were in my mind all day long. It made me think about where I am now and that I have really bad cardio. Even though my grading won't happen for more then a year it's not going to hurt to start now.

     This is a topic that I have been thinking of writing for a while now. I was inspired to finally write it from what was said in class. In todays meeting there was a lot of talk about looking back on where you have came from and where you are going.      When I think of looking back, I look back to one of my lowest points in my kung fu, and that is last summer. Last spring I had a lot going on and I had kung fu on the back burner. Once summer came suddenly I was able to go to kung fu. But for some reason I couldn't bring myself to. I didn't want to face my classmates because I was ashamed of being gone for so long. My stupid solution was to disappear for longer. That only made it worse, when I thought of kung fu I would start to panic. My parents would drag me to kung fu and I would have a panic attack in the parking lot, so most the time I didn't end up going.       I remember the days I still went in everyone was so kind and I made ...

 It is finally summer break! I am done with school for a while.  There is so many less things going on it is making me feel empty. I hope I can start to fill it my time up with more kung fu / my personal requirements.  Canada day was a good start to my summer. It was very exciting first demo! We almost missed the rain, but in the end we were all probably very wet. I am excited for the next demo we do. (hopefully we will have better weather next time)

 I am really happy that I became the buddha. Before I was I felt like I could do anything because it felt like my family was doing everything and I was their shadow. Ever since becoming a buddha my engagement in kung fu, my enjoyment in classes, and my personal thoughts about myself have improved greatly. I love being the buddha.

 Hello. I am struggling. And I know that I should have said that way earlier, but it's not exactly "easy". I know we are a team and that we are there for each other. I just don't know how you would help, I know you guys want to, but it feels like there's nothing that can be done. 

This was one of the best weekends I have had in a while. I slept in on Saturday, then went to open training where I started putting together my team form. It was a lot of fun putting together a form with my friends. The rest of the day I spent time with my school friends, so by the time I got home I felt exhausted, but the good kind like I had actually done something. The next day I spent time with my family and folded a bunch of paper cranes (one of my personal requirements). I studied for my PAT; which I am EXTREMELY nerves about.  This blog probably makes no sense but the point of it is to say that sometimes the more you do the less tired you are. It is kinda weird thing about but for me that's how it works.